Monday, June 28, 2010

26 treatments left

Today i bravely walked into the place I may possibly loathe the most. I really don't like the radiation but it is what I have to do so today I tried to do it with a smile. I tried putting a really strong lotion on my nose so the smell was not so bad and it did lessen it a bit which was nice. The thing that hit me the most today was when I saw a little pink mask right next to mine. I asked them if that was a mask of a little girl and they told me it was. Okay I about broke down into tears. How could I possibly ever complain when a little girl has to go through it too...she surely can't like it either. I bet her mask it tight and she can smell the smell and I bet she has the same types of feelings I have. I feel bad for all those children who have to fight. She should be going to school! Not radiation. I just added "the girl with the pink mask" to my prayers. As far as headaches and nausea it is all getting better. My scar has been really tender lately and they say that will develop a serious case of dandruff and I can feel it coming. My head itches a lot but I am trying to keep it moist to keep the itch away. I don't know if I already shared but the Doctors are giving me a day off of treatment on the 23 of July. It is my birthday present I guess and a sanity break! Josh and I are going to try to see if we can take a weekend off. I can leave Thursday after treatment and have a nice four day weekend away from everything! I am so thankful for a mom who is never afraid to ask questions. She will ask any question even if she is 99% sure the answer is no. I still must tell you that I can feel your prayers. I may sound super strong on the blog but when I am not blogging I have my tough times. Yes, I do take brave breaks and it is nice to know that so many people care and are praying for me and my family. My brother told me that his company has been reading the blog! :) Thanks JP Morgan it made me smile to learn you were reading. I guess there really are people that I don't know who are reading this. I better check for typos one more time! Well I am doing great and happy to be here and I am excited for that 26 to turn to 25. Stay strong and never forget who you are. We will just may take patience! It may take 14 months but we will win. Yesterday I learned all about patience and I decided that I need to be actively patient. I can't just sit around and wait for the end...I need to work happily for the end with a smile! I wish I could have Sister Bang just post her whole lesson on here it was just what I needed! Anyway, the headache says it is time to go lay down.

I believe

Tara Lynn


Urmila Patel said...

Today I read something that reminded me of you I read that "Things that were hard to bear are sweet to remember" and you will forget all this pain and stress and remember all the love that surrounded you when you needed it. We have seen you for the last 15 years become a beautiful young woman. Your hair will grow back more beautiful than it is today. God will give you all the strength you need and the happiness that you deserve. Pictures of you and Josh are amazing. We all love you. Your parents are amzing too. Your neighbors the Patel family.

Anonymous said...

Praying for you in UT and the little girl with the pink mask!

kimpope08 said...

You don't know me but I am getting to know you. A friend of yours asked some of her friends to pray for you... so we are. I want you to know what an inspiration you are. Of course you don't have to stay strong all the time.. but the things you say make me feel strong enough to endure my small trials. Thank you for your testimony and for your faith! And... I will pray for the little girl with the pink mask too!

Brad and Leslie said...

You don't know me either Tara, but your blog is so sweet. (Your Uncle Todd is my companies 401K rep...) Anyhow, I'm a member of the church in Las Vegas, NV. I live near the temple & have stopped by a few times to put your name on the prayer roles. I hope you don't mind. A close friend of mine is also battling cancer (adenocarcinoma - stage IV). You both inspire me. I'll definitely keep reading your blog. You take as many brave breaks as you want to!

- Leslie Johnson