I just have to post - I need to say again how INCREDIBLE it is to have Tara still feeling good! I'm still adjusting to this. When people ask me how Tara is doing, it feels so good to say "she's really feeling good" and have that be the real truth. In the past I have usually been pretty truthful when asked how Tara is doing - I'll answer things like, "today is ok", "she's not good right now", or "fair", or "not good today". None of my answers were ever "she's doing really well!" Now that is the answer. The sun seems brighter (probably in reality IS because it's almost May in Mesa!); the flowers are prettier, and everything around me is just happier. Friends of mine say that I look different (well, I did have my hair highlighted and cut) but it's more than that - I am LIGHTER - there is a weight off my shoulders. It is almost palpable. I am still just reveling in the moments that Tara can live a "normal" life.
She didn't post about Disneyland - she and Josh DID go and it was a treasured day for me to spend the Saturday before they left with Tara planning their trip. It was soooo refreshing to me to have Tara getting excited about a getaway with her husband without any IV's tagging along, doctor appointments looming ahead, or anything in the way! (actually we did postpone an MRI but I ordered her to GO on this trip and this MRI was not getting in the way of her fun). She said she actually went on rides; and the strobe lights started a seizure; but then she closed her eyes and it went away - no more strobe lights or 3D for Tara. They also went sightseeing in LA and I was so very happy the 2 of them could get away together out of state! They wanted to do Disneyland for their honeymoon, but of course, couldn't.
Now Tara is in CA for a friend's wedding. Yesterday as she bounced around being so excited for her weekend with her old roommates and friends, once again, I just watched and smiled at her and just LOVED seeing her feel so good. She had energy; her eyes are alive and happy, and I just can't say enough how AWESOME this is! How great to get on a plane and not worry about seizures, head leaking, meds, or doctors. What a treat!
I have learned how to enjoy the day. Today the sun is shining, and I can't project into the future - I have learned not to do that. I just have to enjoy TODAY and believe me, I am! I don't see Tara nearly as much - I do miss her; but it's so awesome to enjoy a more alive Tara when I do see her! I love having her live her life. Josh is so happy to have a wife around that isn't sick as well. He has been so positive and supportive through these past 2 years. Can you believe it's been 2 years? 2 years ago she was having crazy headaches and this whole thing started. It's really been 2 years since she felt this good. It's a good thing we did take this life day by day - we didn't know what we were getting in to when we started - we just had to take a little at a time - but now she's DONE with treatment! She's only on 2 seizure meds now - that's awesome! Maybe someday those can be gone as well - but it will be awhile before that happens.
We still have hurdles up ahead; but today, we are enjoying life. We appreciate your prayers in Tara's behalf - many people with her tumor don't even live 2 years - so she's already a miracle! And she will CONTINUE to be a miracle!
Love you all,