Thursday, September 22, 2011

still there??

Are you still there...still checking after all these days of me NOT posting? Ya, I took another long break from posting and I have been informed that there are many of you out there who are getting frustrated with the lack of bloggingness! so here I am! Thank you miss Chol for the wonderful new background...I feel it quite appropriate for the blog. Reasons that I have not been blogging... well there are not any good ones especially because I have had so many good things happen in my life in the past month.

First on my mind and very exciting to me. I ran my first mile since diagnosis!!! I was so sore the next day but it felt so good...I ran a mile only to end up in the ER the next day for...kidney stones...yay :( not sure if I wrote about my first encounter with them...this is my second this month. I have a happy 6 mm kidney stone sitting in my right kidney waiting to drop and cause me extreme pain...time bomb waiting to explode! We are going to try to dissolve the little bugger before it gets on the move.


Okay so we are through kidney stones 1 and 2 and my mile maddness... now onto my wonderful new opportunity next summer! I guess since girls camp I have started myself a little speaking career. Next summer I have the wonderful opportunity to speak at a girls conference called Time to Blossom. I am so grateful that I will have this chance to share what I know and love with all these girls. Earlier this month I also spoke at a Stake Standards Night and got to share my testimony of how important our standards are and how they can either lead us to the temple...or away. Growing up I have always been petrified of speaking to people but now I get to talk to people about something that I am so passionate about. I get to share my story and my miracles. I get to share my testimony and my love for my Savior. I hope to inspire them with the experiences that have inspired me! I get to share with them something that has become a major part of who I am. Every time I talk to the youth I feel so strong that it is what it is what I am supposed to be doing. I pray that I continue to have more chances. I feel like I can be needed here to help the youth and others around me with my story. This is another reason that my trial has been a blessing. I absolutely love sharing my story. My hair is getting really long and I am looking more normal. People don't stare as much as they used to and this may sound weird but i don't like it. I like people asking me about my head and I like being different. My hair is getting so long that my oncologist asked if I was wearing a hairpiece today...seriously Shapiro??? :) Then I went to the watch place with my momma and another man thought I was a different daughter of my moms...

Okay next item of business

Last night I finished a treatment of Chemo and what does that mean????? ONE MORE LEFT??? UNO, 1,  only one more and then...well, then I am done! What am I going to do with myself??? :) ha we are going to party in the British Virgin Islands in December to celebrate! Mom will be celebrating the most...celebrating less trips to barrows, less grumpy sick Tara days, less chemo days, and most importantly...not shopping for one Christmas present!! We are going to give each other gifts that don't cost money this year and go on the cruise together!! So exciting!  I have mixed feelings about being done with Chemo but I guess it will be nice to not get sick...i just like having that medicine fight for me in my brain...it gives me peace. I also have mixed feelings about getting in the water. Some call it fear. Okay I will admit that I am scared to get in the water. Maybe a little because of sharks but mostly because of my wonderful head. I just do not want to end up in a hospital bed again. I am just so scared that the water will somehow get in there. The doctors have assured me that I will be just fine and I know that they are right...I just still am a little scared. I am sure I can work through it by December though.

Wow...a lot more has happened this last month but I am getting kinda tired so I think I will try to rap it up but before I do I must tell you the highlight of my month.

MY SISTER-IN-LAW IS PREGNANT!!!!!! 9/9/11 we found out. I was in getting an x ray on my kidney and when I come out my mom is literally screaming that Steph is pregnant. The whole office and waiting room is very excited for us! I am sure the neighbors heard too... :) They have been trying for a while and I am so excited to see this new Schlappi!! Ah 9 months need to fly by fast

okay last item of business

SCORPION

some of you may know how I feel about scorpions. If you don't. I do not hate a lot of things. I feel like hate is a very strong word so I use it carefully. I do not hate cockroaches or spiders. I do, however, HATE, loathe entirely scorpions.

(as a note before the story... WealthPlan was having its' first conference and we gathered all employees from across the country. Angie, our newest employee, had the blessing of staying at our house...lucky her :) )

2 loverly evenings ago I was settling down to watch me some HGTV...a personal favorite! I grabbed my favorite blankie...still call it that and plopped on the couch with Angie. I look over my left shoulder to see a tan, very alive, man-eating scorpion ready to kill me. I of course screamed, began hyperventilating and jumped to higher ground while throwing the blanket across the room. Angie was a bit confused to say the least. She understood further when I began screaming scorpion over and over. I told her to get Josh quick so he could kill the beast but instead she found it and killed it...what a brave soul. I have still never killed scorpion and I intend to keep it that way. A special thanks goes out to Angie for saving my life!! :)

ha I just told Joshua that I was writing about Scorpions (he is ready for me to be done as well) and he asked me if people wanted to hear about scorpions. well people you probably don't but I want to keep this as my journal so it stays!

Okay now the rambling has gone to far!!

ahh I missed blogging!

I love you!!

Thanks for being faithful

Tara! :)


Monday, September 5, 2011

2 more months...I am beginning to feel normal...I think

Today I woke up and decided that I was going to be normal. To tell you the truth I really don't know what normal is anymore but I sure tried starting with a nice healthy workout. I actually rode a bike for 32 minutes and 17 seconds...the most I have exercised since may 13, 2010! Today I was lucky enough to ride in front of a mirror. I happened to wear my "Brain tumors stink...that's what I think" and "Cancer fears Me!" shirt that I made. Could not have chosen a better shirt to wear. As I looked up I saw myself as someone who was overcoming and empowered. I really felt that cancer was fearing me. With every minute I could feel myself pounding the cancer out of me. I feel like since I have received more comfort from the doctors I have begun to relax and stop pondering about the whole situation as much and it has been so nice. I sweat so much my hair was drenched...and I got to help Josh clean the cars! I have never been so happy to wake up and clean the cars. I was just happy that I felt well enough to face the heat and do some work....I felt more normal again. I ended up running to Walmart after and still had my shirt on. I actually enjoyed people staring at me. They saw my funny haircut and then the back of my shirt! The Lord promises that we are called to pass through trials and that they will only be for a small moment. Today as I look back I feel as if it is becoming a small moment...I feel like I am so much more  and most importantly I feel like I have the potential to be so much more. I have had the opportunity to share what I have learned with a lot of people and that brings me joy. I am so happy to share my deep feelings of what I believe and know. The light at the end of the tunnel is here and I know exactly what I am going to do when I get out of this! Cancer can't have me. I am much more.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Hair

Okay so my mother feels it necessary that you all get to see  a few pictures of me and my new hair (that has been recently cut). She took a few pictures when I was wearing make-up and normal clothes so she may be surprised when she sees this but it's all good!

The other night for the first time I blow-dried my new hairs!!!

And if that wasn't enough I teased it...and then I curled it...and then combed it and fluffed it every which way possible!

Josh had tons of fun taking pictures of all my hair styles...so happy that I actually can have a "style" now.

Man I really looked like a goof!
The first curls!



Odd comb out of curls




Joshua's favorite


I got a little tease happy on this one


I got my grandma style all ready for when I am older...Josh is hoping the Second Coming comes quick... :)



Ahhh that was a nice random post...

I felt it more interesting than all the doctors I have been to because of my silly kidney stone...

Happy 50 tomorrow dad!!!